Tamar’s Clutter

“Let go of what you do
Let it go like a pebble dropping, sinking
to the bottom of a lake.
If you do not chase it
If you do not plunge in after it
The ripples of its passing
Will once again return to stillness

Forget yourself.
Return to Stillness.
Know that we are One.”

International Sheng Zheng Society

This poem is a dream. Maybe by the age of 100, I will live my life without attachments or distractions. But not now. I am deeply rooted and attached to life on earth.

Tamar and Daisy – A Romp through Clutter

For the past 4 years, I’ve been romping through my clutter: cardboard boxes, junk around the property, mouldy books and bug-eaten books inherited from my parent’s library and stored in basement boxes for 11 years, rat poops, broken tools, photos, files, old letters, clothes, records, CD’s, tapes, kitchen stuff. It boggles my mind – how much STUFF I have collected in my life time. I am a bit like Scrooge in Charles Dickens “A Christmas Carol”. I don’t horde money. I horde memories!

The crunch is on. I am moving in June.  I must tackle the mess, the infernal clutter that weighs me down. I can’t take it all with me. So I’ve shredded over 10 boxes of papers, given away over 1,000 pounds of books (or burnt the mouldy ones with tremendous chagrin), tossed things, showered the local Thrift stores with my junk and some very pretty clothes, donated photos and art work to local auctions, given broken antiques to a friend, and still I have too muchHow I wish a bull-dozer would come in the night and take away all my STUFF so I can fly free in my next adventure, celebrating whom I am now. But there is no bull-dozer in sight. And should one really come to destroy all trace of my past, my heart would break. Every fibre of me screams, “NO!” I am not ready for this. Not now!”

So what can I do?

I make a cup of tea, take a deep breath, open a file, and begin the journey of reading every piece of paper I have kept for the past 4 decades.  Treasures pop up along the way.  Reviewing my life is like opening Christmas presents. You never know what surprises you will find!

Yes, I AM my Clutter!  While dreaming of an uncluttered environment and a life free from my past,  I must accept who I am with compassion, and somehow find my way to an uncluttered life. It might take another 10 years, but having entered the journey, I shower blessings upon myself along the way. I  dive into my past,  chasing the pebbles that have sunk  to oblivion, bringing them up to the surface,  glistening in sunlight, turning them over and marvelling at the complexity and awe of my life’s journey.

I hope you will find encouragement to celebrate who you are when you go through your stuff. Be creative! Stage fun events as you lighten your load. And yes, laugh and cry as the memories flood through you. You will survive.

I hope my journey will inspire you to take a good look at your life, following tangents and people who have graced your life in the past, re-kindling connections while keeping in mind what you wish to create during the next phase of your life. Good luck!.

Check out Tamar’s Photography website www.tamargriggs.com (orca, seals, sea lions, heron, eagle, moons and boats are some of her themes).